I am just sitting down for the evening.

Saturday, April 08, 2006
I've been at mother's sincce about seven this morning. Last week we went over to see her and daddy and see how she was feeling. They had been to the oncologist that afternoon and we also wanted to hear what he had told them.

Mother is going to have to undergo a six week/5 days a week Chemotherapy and Radiation session.

It wasn't too easy for any of us to hear so I haven't been able to write about it either. It's a preventative measure the oncologist feels will help ensure the cancer doesn't come back - or at least improve the odds that it doesn't come back again - and hopefully kill any that might still be there. The drugs that they give these days for the nausea and vomitting are much better and the doctor says, though she will get sick, it won't be as badly as it could be.

It's going to start in about three weeks. She needs more time to heal from the surgery and gain her strength back and a little weight, too. Her appetite isn't too strong yet, but it's getting better every day. She's getting stronger, too. She still isn't sleeping too good at night - doesn't sleep all the way through. Tonight she was pretty tired when I left. She was up most of the day and didn't nap during the day so maybe she'll be tired enough that she'll sleep through the night tonight.

I asked mother last week if she was scared about undergoing the chemo and radiation. She was she was nervous, but knew that going through it was the right thing to do. I just hate to think about her having to go through all that, but I know after it's all over she is going to be a lot healthier and the pain she's been enduring for so long will be gone.

I wish we were able to know how long the cancer had been there. It's hard to imagine her having it all this time and none of the doctors were able to discover it until after they did this past surgery and removed it - along with more than half her pancreas, her spleen, and other tumors.

I guess it's better we didn't know until after, though b/c knowing she had a malignant tumor inside her I am sure would be a lot harder to go through than knowing after it was already out. Less anxiety maybe; though, there is still the anxiety of wondering when/if it's ever going to come back again.