Wednesday, February 05, 2003

My friend...

I see this man sitting next to me...he has his hand on my knee or across my shoulders...and it is such a comfort just to be there. We're eating and talking with friends and he brushes my neck with his fingers as he puts an arm around me and I know what he is thinking. "I'm glad we met..." "I am, too..." "I'm comfortable with you..." "I feel like this is the right place to be..." There is a great security in that unspoken conversation that I haven't really felt with anyone before him. Every day is filled with anticipation just to get that middle-of-the-day-no-special-reason-other-than-to-hear-your-voice phone call and to see one another after work and ask, "How was your day?" No, I'm not giddy - I think you reach a point of maturity in your life when you realize that you shouldn't be feeling the same little butterflies that you felt when you were thirteen, sixteen, or even twenty. (Those butterflies didn't lead me to anything but tears, so I am not sad I don't feel them now.) I don't know exactly what I thought was missing before, but it isn't missing anymore...

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